My son loves pink, get over it!

Hi Keris, I thought this was a fabulous and thoughtful post. People can be so quick to say things that they feel they should, children constantly surprise us with their wisdom and innocence - why shouldn't a litte boy love pink? And why should anyone think it's something to comment on in such a way?

As a childminder I try to provide a play environment which doesn't have any gender expectations - boys and girls are encouraged to play with dolls, trucks, play football and bake equally. Pink does seem to be recognised as being 'girl' though and from around age of three or four I notice the children have ideas about what is for girls and what is for boys. Whatever the children or society expects I think it's good to have home as a place where you can do your own thing.

Such a shame people assign importance to silly things like colour preference. Doesn't help that toy makers colour gender neutral things either pink or blue.

Tell your son next time a mate comments that pink used to be thought of as a boy's colour because it was a shade of red, which was considered masculine!

Good point about red, Deb! My girls have had lots of male friends who have loved pink, and playing with their 'girl' toys when visiting our home - until they get to a certain age, and they become self-conscious about such things. It's just a colour - we should make more pink things for boys and make them come to terms with this!

Pink for girls, blue for boys is actually a really modern phenomenon isn't it? 100 years ago, boys were always dressed in pink, as it was thought of as a shade of red, and thought to be a more powerful colour. (I'm sure this is all true and that I'm not making it up...)

Historically boys always wore pink (according to a question on QI) and weren't they dressed as girls when they were babies and toddlers? Pink should be just a colour and available to all. My daughter was once teased at school for her 'boy's trainers' because they were blue. I hadn't given it a second thought when I bought them. It's a shame that a tiny thing like colour can cause such upset. Good luck to Harry and his sparkly pink bedroom.

I think it's really important to let boys and girls express their individuality, but you're right it does get harder as they get older! It's not until adulthood that it suddenly becomes cool to wear a pink jumper!! It's important though that as parents we encourage our children to express their opinions and preferences from a really early age. I'm a mother of a little boy and also have friends with little boys who love jewellery, makeup and dress up. They watch us get ready in the morning so you'd expect them to immitate. At school age I think giving your children the confidence to stick up for their tastes is so important. And, I think the pink carpet and sparkles sounds like the best bedroom ever!

Thanks for all the lovely comments. Yep, boys definitely wore pink and girls wore blue (note the Virgin Mary always in blue). I heard somewhere recently that it only changed as a result of the nazis designating pink to homosexuals, but I don't know if that's true.

Maggie, it's interesting that your daughter's blue trainers were commented on. I always assumed boys were picked on for liking "girly" things, while girls could have both. It's such a shame. So many adults collude with it though (often without thinking). Our local librarian has made comments to both of my boys when they picked up Barbie books (pink!). You know, "What do you want that for? That's a girls' book!" I've yet to come up with any sort of response. I just mutter under my breath and then lecture my boys about narrow-minded people.

Hooray for Harry! Pink is a color like all the rest of them. It's about personal preference. Why should he change just to appease what someone else considers normal. I agree with the comment about letting him express his individuality.
Michael who is 6 has a flair for the extreme: loves glitter, stars, gold, feathers, beads and I buy it all for him. He hates sports but loves arts and crafts. Why would I push him towards sports when he 's so happy & content when he's creating things? (Luckily, his best mate at school also hates sports) He told me last week that he'd like to take a sewing class. Well why not? I'm a girl and I stink at sewing!
I refuse to let society dictate what my child's interests are going to be. However, like you Keris, I would be angry if some narrow minded individual made a comment to him.

I think as parents our worry is always around how other people will treat our little bundles or joy however, what we need to focus on and teach our children is that they choose how they respond to any situation. If someone is being mean, as many children are, if your child respond with a smile or a laugh they hold all the power.

Oh Keris what a wonderful post!! I love your attitude towards the whole pink vs. blue thing because it's the same as mine :-)

My three year old son watches his older sister dress up in sparkly fairy dresses with wands etc and wants to join her. Who wouldn't - it's so much fun dressing up. He also wears a skeleton suit and Buzz Lightyear outfit, as does my daughter. He is often found walking around the house with her sporting one of her fairy dresses, whilst doing DIY with his toolset. I think it's wonderful that your son is an individual and is already able to express his likes and dislikes so confidently.

In terms of your librarian, that is a really disappointing statement. Surely the fact that you are in a library, with your boys (who want to take books out) is a massive achievement in itself... does it really matter what they are reading? Perhaps an answer like "gosh wouldn't it be sad if boys were excluded from the joy of reading books just because they had pink covers?" :-)

Leigh
Ready for Ten Team

My boy also has a penchant for pink, and some things others consider 'girly'. Like he has a pink Vtech game he plays with. If people try to play on this, I just reassure him it's them that have the problem, a closed and pre-considered mind, to be precise. I think exposure to the ill considered judgement of others is no bad thing, it can teach children to be sure of mind and strong in their decision making.

I'm all for children finding their own path and making their own choices. I don't think they should be swayed by society's expectations but that isn't always easy of course. Growing up my favourite colour was blue and still is. Funny how no-one would bat an eyelid at that.

Gosh - that's a real toughie isn't it. When my little boy goes around to my neighbours he plays with her daughter's pink shopping trolley and has a lovely time. It's a shame that if was the other way round, and her little girl was playing with Oliver's blue quad bike, not many people would bat an eyelid. Isn't it lovely to be a child that young and not actually notice or care that it's taken one way or the other?

When my youngest son was around six years old he went through a phase of telling everyone that pink was his favourite colour. He didn't see anything wrong with it, and neither did I.

This post also made me think about when my eldest son asked for a pushchair. It was when his brother was born and he wanted to push his teddy along whilst I pushed his brother. I didn't see anything wrong with that either but did get a few comments from my hubby and other relatives who thought it was a bit 'girlie'.

When my boys were younger they had a playhouse and I bought them a cooker, saucepans and a tea set. They loved playing in that house, cooking us meals and making cups of tea. This again was seen as 'girlie' by some people. I just saw it as them wanting to copy me and feel grown up. What's wrong with that?

So when my son said his favourite colour was pink, I didn't make a big thing of it. After a couple of months his favourite colour changed, just like his preferences to many other things.