I won't be giving it up any time soon.
Do you read your child a bedtime story? We've read to both of our boys since before they were even born - yes, my husband used to read to my pregnant belly - and we still read with them both almost every night.
But a survey for phone and broadband company TalkTalk has found that 57 per cent of Britons believe that the tradition of parents reading bedtime stories to their children is dying out. Their research suggests that while people have good intentions about reading to their kids, they find it hard to fit it into their schedules.
We skip something else instead
To be honest, if we're really pushed for time we're actually more likely to skip homework or teeth-cleaning (both of which are often a bit of a drama) than we are bedtime reading. It's how we wind down at the end of the day and his dad and I enjoy it just as much as Harry does.
Eighty-five per cent of the respondents to TalkTalk's survey agreed that reading to young children enhances their development, but that's not really why we do it. Yes, lately we've been trying to get Harry to read more advanced books and actually do some of the reading himself rather than being read to, but that's a secondary consideration. Our priority is snuggling up in bed and sharing a moment and a story.
I don't actually remember my parents reading to me - although I'm sure they probably did - but I do remember curling up in my nan's bed on Sunday morning, while she read to us from Her Benny: A Tale of Victorian Liverpool and we both cried. It was special. It was like a time out from the real world and it was a much treasured routine. That's what I want for my boys.
I want them to know that for the last half an hour before they go to sleep, I'm not on Twitter, the phone doesn't get answered, the TV is off and they have our full attention.
If we couldn't fit that into our schedule, we'd have to change our schedule.
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06 March, 2011
I agree completely! Great post.
My daughters are now almost 9 and I have just this year, reluctantly, begun to skip reading them a story before bed.
As we live abroad they not only have to read their English books every-night, but also for their Turkish homework they have to read at least 5 pages per night and then write a brief 'review' of what they read. This is on top of the usual homework they get... so there's very little time for anything else. We gave up the nightly baths long ago!
Luckily my girls LOVE to read, as do I, and i often have to insist their lights go out an hour or more after they first got into bed!
I still make sure i crawl in beside them each, ask how their books are going, and how they are doing in general so we can have a chat and a long cuddle and lots of kisses, but we still miss the time for reading together.
So a few weeks ago we all had a chat and decided that we would make sure I still read to them together at least twice a week. My daughters still love so many of their picture books, but as they are now fully immersed in Harry Potter, Guardians of GaHoole and Niel Gaiman and the like, they wouldn't bother to read them. But they still love to be 'read to', and for as long as they want it I will be happy to oblige!
07 March, 2011
Being read to is such a treat for kids and such precious bonding time. My mum used to read to me until I was well past the picture-book years: when I was 11 we got through Wuthering Heights. I don't recall absorbing that much of the story, but I vividly remember how loved I felt as she read to me. I hope this post inspires more parents to read to their kids – I can think of few more valuable ways to spend an evening.
mum
07 March, 2011
I couldn't agree more either. I was very disappointed to see the results of the survey.
My two - now nine and seven - demand to be read to every evening. At the moment we're reading The Hobbit. When I've finished they then read their own books while listening to a favourite audio book - perhaps Stephen Fry reading Paddington or Maureen Lipman reading The Owl Who Was Afraid of the Dark. I don't think they could fall asleep without being read to - after all we've been training them into the habit since they were babies.
It's such a special time to share with your children. I agree with you Keris, it's far more important than homework, baths or cleaning teeth.
07 March, 2011
I think the bedtime story is an essential for getting children reading, as a very young first time mum, I never read to my eldest and he doesn't like reading, I've read to my 7 yr old virtually every night of his life and he loves books almost as much as I do.
That's all the proof I need of how important a bedtime story is.
07 March, 2011
Again, disappointed in these results. Since my son has been very small we have always read at bedtime and we also make up our own stories. I start by saying "once upon a time there was" and Oliver replies with his choice of characters that he would like to appear in his story and he chooses what happens next. I'm sure you get the gist! We've always really enjoyed this special time that we have together snuggled up in his bed. When he was very little, I used to read my books to him, which was my way of being able to read as he didn't understand what the words were anyway, but we haven't done that for a long time! I still find it amusing that a child can read the same story time and time again, and it's like they're hearing it for the first time, but can't quite work out at which age, this stops.
My mom was a book worm like me and we always read together at bedtime especially. Lots of parents these days are too selfish to spend time with their kids as there's always something more important for them to do but I beleive that special time with your children is something you can never get back. I believe that you should make the most of every minute as they are the most precious gifts you will ever been given and I want to be the best mom I can to my boy. I don't want to have on my headstone that I was good on the computer, or a hard worker, or had a clean house or loved the soaps. I want my child to remember that I was a great mom and that's exactly what I say about my mom as I know that she was the most unselfish person I know and always put spending special time with her girls before herself. OK - I'll stop ranting now!
09 March, 2011
Great topic. For me it was not so much reading a story but making one up. The theme was always the same and the characters became established. My wife used to sit on the stairs and listen too! The aim behind my stories was not to encourage reading directly but to quieten the mind and prepare for sleep in a relaxing and imaginative way. I have to say it helped me do the same! I recently discovered that by accident I had based the structure of the stories on guided meditation, something I now use to quieten my mind. I did on one occasion try to write some of the stories down but found they were far better when told directly to an audience. So long live "Mr Dream Man and the dream bridge" for have you ever wondered who does all those jobs of cleaning the leaves on the trees or washing the clouds ready for the next day and would you like to help him? I wonder if I could tell these stories on Skype - my two children are now 25 and 21 (years not months!) and go to bet way after me.
mum
09 March, 2011
Thanks for all the great responses.
Kevin, I love the idea of Mr Dream Man - you should write the stories down. Considering I write fiction for a job, I'm rubbish at making up stories for my boys - my mind goes blank!