Can you make sense of teacher talk?
Those of us of a certain age will remember a time when teachers didn’t pull any punches when it came to talking to parents about their children. These days, teachers are far more restrained. In fact, some are so diplomatic, you may find yourself wondering what they are really getting at.
Here's my guide, based on experience as a teacher, a writer and a mum, of course, to what these keepers of the classroom say and what they may just be thinking.
Sometimes you suspect you can tell what they really mean and wince or sometimes you may smile -- as you know they're speaking the truth. Are there any examples you could add?
What they say: “Thomas needs to focus on improving his listening skills.”
What they really mean: “Sometimes I wish he’d put a sock in it.”
What they say: “Chloe is a natural leader.”
What they really mean: “What a bossy little madam.”
What they say: “Sophie is a lively member of the class.”
What they really mean: “She’s can be a cheeky little so-and-so.”
What they say: “James has a good sense of humour.”
What they really mean: “I wish he’d stop playing the class clown.”
What they say: “Holly needs to work on her organisational skills.”
What they really mean: “She’d forget her head if wasn’t screwed on.”
It's not all bad
If you suspect your child’s teacher isn’t being completely truthful when they talk about your child, don’t assume their intentions are bad. As one Year 3 teacher said to me recently, "We do sometimes try to save parents and children’s feelings – but only because we care."
Nevertheless, if you find you are having to read between the lines, don’t be afraid to ask your child’s teacher if they can explain their comments more clearly. If you can get to grips with their concerns, you are much better equipped help resolve them.
And rest assured, while teachers may tread carefully when highlighting your child’s faults, any praise is usually heartfelt and genuine. So if your child’s teacher says they are "conscientious" or a "pleasure to teach" you should feel reassured that they definitely mean it.
Phew.
Find out more about the secret world of teachers...
If you want to find out a bit more about what teachers are thinking, check out these blogs by primary teachers on school life:
• Teacher of the Frickin' Year
• Edublogs
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02 September, 2011
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05 September, 2011
I needed a giggle today Janet and this just provided it for me! I have few friends that are teachers and they had previously also "translated" a few stock comments for me, much to my amusement. My daughter has had the same teacher for both reception and year 1, and she was always very honest in her approach with us, which we really appreciated this as our little cherub can be quite challenging at times. Because she receives a lot of support at school from the teachers, the physio and the OT for her condition, we need to have a lot of straight answers so that we can ensure she is getting the right support for her needs at the time. I appreciate some parents may find critical comments a little more difficult to deal with, so the above would definately soften the "blow" perfectly. As we have a new teacher this year, I'll await the first school report with enthusiasm.
Leigh
Ready for Ten Team
07 October, 2011
Yes, I laughed when the teacher and TA said to me that there were a 'lot of strong characters' amongst the girls in my DD's class and gave her a pointed look! I'm from a family of teachers and know *exactly* what they mean. I expect to hear lots of 'she's spirited' type comments!